With January in Chicago in full force, it’s time for us Chicagoans to look back at the year that’s gone by. Lots of shit has happened in the Windy City this year—and the most of it, not so good. Like some great philosopher once said, ‘Learn from the past, lest it repeat itself.’ So what better way to learn from the past year than by taking a look back at it. So let’s go–we’re here to present you with Chicago’s Biggest FAILS of 2009.
Failed 2016 Chicago Olympic Bid
Is there anything out there, throughout time, that epitomizes the biggest disappointment for a city better than the Chicago 2016 Olympic Bid? Because if there is, I’d definitely like to check that out. Chicago’s failed attempt at capturing the world’s attention in 2016 instead brought about a laughing cynicism in 2009. Instead of actually trying to solve some of the city’s economic woes in the short term, the Olympic Bid Committee decided to gamble $100 million dollars (I couldn’t believe this number either) to attempt to lure the Olympics to Chicago. FAIL. Now look where we’re at: major conventions leaving Chicago, crime rate seemingly at an all-time high, wide spread unemployment, and a mass transit system cutting its services. Way to go Chicago—way to look out for your citizens.
2009 Chicago Cubs
I initially wanted to say that the Cubs choked again this year, like they do every year. But to say that, I would be implying that they had something to choke away. This Cubs team had the worst chemistry since Sosa was toting his boom box around. And I think we can all pin it on one player in particular—a player with a certain name of Milton Bradley. This man was a cancer in the clubhouse from nearly day one. When he wasn’t calling Cubs fans racist, he was taking himself out of the lineup and refusing to hit. I’ve been a Cubs fan all my life, and will continue to be one until the day I die. And I know that I’ll be able to look back at the 2009 Cubs season as one of the worst, most pathetic attempts at professional baseball that I’ve ever seen. The one bright side of this season? We can only go up from here (I hope. . . )
Chicago’s Parking Meter Deal – Chicago’s Payday Loan
In a city that lives and breathes crooked politicians, crooked cops, and straight up corruption, it’s always nice to see our city government letting some of this drip down to its citizens. I’m talking about Chicago’s decision to sell off our parking meters for seventy five years for a lump sum of $1.15 billion. Sure, this deal sounds great now—we get over a billion dollars in our pocket. Too bad that money’s already spent or is going to be spent in the budget next year. And it’s not usually wise to sell off an asset that would make above and beyond $1 billion over the next 75 years. Not only will Chicago not have these revenues from parking meters coming in next year (or the looooong future), but us citizens are getting pinched by the raised meter rates. Now, Chicago, if you were going to up the rates of the meters anyways, why not keep control of these cash cows?
The Chicago Police Department
2009 has been a rough year for the CPD. While the murder rate for 2009 is down overall throughout the city, muggings, burglary, and police brutality seem to be at an all time high. We’ve all seen the tape of Anthony Abbate beating the living crap out of that poor bartender. And we’ve all heard about the muggings that were running rampant in Lincoln Park during the summer months. All in all, the Chicago Police Department didn’t really come off as ‘Serving and Protecting’ its citizens in 2009.
Roddie B and The Burris Fiasco
Rod Blagojevich—wow. What a great symbol of everything that Chicago (and Illinois, for that matter) stand for. Corruption (although not proven just yet), cronyism, and just straight up ridiculous management of the entire state of Illinois ran rampant during his tenure as Governor. And his appointment of Roland Burris to Obama’s Senate seat? Absolutely off the wall.
Even though I know there are so many more ways that Chicago has failed in 2009, it makes me depressed just researching and writing about them. If 2009 was this bad for Chicago, I can’t wait to see how 2010 turns out.
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